Every movement has a day it starts speaking out loud. For sheet-native computing, that day is today. The Sheet-Native Computing Foundation is proud to release the first-ever episode of the Sheet-Native Podcast — the first recorded conversation of a movement that took cloud-native infrastructure and moved it, entirely, into a spreadsheet.
Our first guest is Jörg van der Spreadt, Principal Sheet-Native Architect at NoordFracht Logistics B.V. in Rotterdam — a man who did the thing most engineers only joke about at conferences. He took production, a live logistics company, and moved it into a spreadsheet. Then he wrote the business case.
It is all here, delivered completely straight-faced: a control plane that is, technically, free; a TCO of zero; an ROI of minus 340%, which he presented to the board as a feature; disaster recovery via Ctrl+Z; and a container registry that is just a tab. It compiles. It passes tests. It survives a node dying. And, most importantly, it reconciles.
What's in the episode
- From steel containers on ships to containers in cells
- The first reconcile — the moment of conversion
- Selling it to the CFO: TCO equals zero
- ROI: minus 340%, and why that's a feature
- The eighteen engineers, and the schism that followed
- What actually runs in the sheet, in production, right now
- Security and scale, addressed like adults
The podcast is in English. Host: Timur Tukaev, founder of the Sheet-Native Computing Foundation. It is satire. The spreadsheet is real. Both are performed with a straight face.
Watch Episode 1: youtu.be/nCXvre3bAmY. New episodes will follow. If you have ever stared at a cloud bill at three in the morning and thought "there has to be another way" — there is. It has rows. It has columns.
It reconciles.